How hard can it be

Seriously, how hard can it be? I failed for the third time today with a 74. That is one point people, ONE point. 75 is passing. So, I did some retail therapy on the way home and stopped at NM Last Call and got two shirts.

Failed

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me

I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed

She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb

In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

That's right I failed my national exam again. I even managed to fail worse this time than last time.

To make things even worse my kid is a BRAT. We went to a friends house for dinner and he screamed like a girl and cried and bugged people the whole time. He complained about dinner, he threw something at his friend so she kicked him in the face. I am at my wits end with him. I can't take him anywhere. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh

Thank God for friends that know how to make awesome Cosmos and then serve me the best stir fry I think I have ever had. Oh and of course some great wine with dinner.

Brain Transplant

If this is possible I would like to be put on the waiting list immediately. I am studying to retake the national real estate exam and I can't remember anything. I can not choose the correct answer in multiple choice tests to save my life. I seem to just geek out and pick the wrong thing. I am driving myself crazy and starting to panic. I just want to pass and be done with all this. Please please let me pass............

Do the pee pee dance

We have had a breakthrough! I asked Davis if he needed to go potty before we put his diaper on and he said yes and climbed up on the big potty before I could even get there to help him. Alas, he peed his waterfall into the potty and it was no small amount.

A huge pee pee dance and party ensued in my bathroom following the event.
Davis pee peed on the Pot-Tay..Davis pee peed on the Pot-Tay..Everybody this time..Davis pee peed on the Pot-Tay..with your hands in the air..Davis pee peed on the Pot-Tay. Okay so you get the picture.

So, thank you Emma for sitting on the potty in front of my kid today like it was no big deal. Maybe it was seeing someone his own age climb up on the big potty that cinched the deal. He sees his big brother all the time, but is so not interested. This is only the second time in history that he has sat on the big potty without being scared out of his mind. The last time was Kelli’s house when he accidentally squeezed out a terd. In an attempt to speed the potty training process along I let him pick out some new Diego underware at the store. I tried putting them on him and he threw a fit and did not want to wear them. I told him he was a big boy and big boys wear underwear. To which he whines "I don't want to be a big boy". Sheesh!

I am not getting rid of any diapers yet, but I am so thrilled that he finally used the right muscles and pee came out. Usually he just farts on the little kid potty.

Happy birthday to Davis (and Clint)

Davis had his 3rd birthday party this weekend. I think it was a fun time for all.
The kids had hot dogs, kool aid and cake and the adults had brats, jello shots and blue margaritas! The blue margs were part of the fish themed birthday party complete with a gummy fish swimming around in them.
I think the only bummer of the night was that our good friends had to leave to go to a dinner party. They planned on breaking away and coming back, but the husband had an allergic reaction to the food that was served and had to go to the E.R. Needless to say they did not make it back.
As a little side note here I would like to add that the hostess of the dinner party served pork baked with pesto sauce and walnuts and tells our friends repeatedly that there are not any nuts in the meal. Hello, his throat is closing, still claiming no nuts????
Clint was all excited to show off his new TVs he got (yes that is plural). I was assuming that these TVs were his birthday and fathers day gifts, but I was wrong. He and another friend both went out and bought new XBOX 360s. Whatever!

Summer School Love

So here is my conversation with Derek on the way home from school today:

Derek: Isabella has eleven boys that like her.
Me: Wow, Isabella must be a really nice girl.
Derek: Yep, Ryan says he is in love with her. I'm not though, I just made love with her.
Me: Oh

Good to know my kid will just be a one night stand kind of guy!

I'm done with my gum

Derek and Davis love to chew gum. When they are finished with their gum they like to throw it out the car window. This is fine with me as long as there are not any cars next to us and we are not on neighborhood streets where it might get stuck to some one's shoe.
So, today we are driving home from the mall where both the boys got a huge piece of gum from the big rolling spiral gumball machine. Derek decides he is finished with his gum and asks to throw it out the window. So he rolls down his window and is ready to throw when Clint tells him "No, no not yet". Too late. Derek threw is giant purple wad of gum right smack dab in the center of some poor dudes windshield. Now this guy was not driving a family Honda or Kia oh no, he is driving his electric blue mac daddy car. He is the type whose pride and joy is his car with the custom paint job, fancy rims and a spoiler thingy on the back.
Derek is a little concerned because Clint is mouthing "I am SO sorry" as the guy pulls up right next to us. Luckily he was nice and gave a casual wave and an "it's okay" nod.

I just want one

So, the binky fairy finally came to our house today. Davis was not very happy about it and he is still playing in his room instead of napping. We decorated a bag, went around and gathered up all the binkys and put them on the front porch. Then it was nap time and all hell broke loose.
He cried and screamed. I WANT MY BINKY. When I went in to comfort him and tell him the binky fairy already came and took them to the babies he very sad and pouty said "I just want one". "Just one binky momma" I told him they were all gone and we went downstairs to see if he was left any presents. He did perk up at the sight of a new Cars pillow and a Diego rescue pack. It is starting to quiet down in his room so I am crossing my fingers that he is finally going to sleep binky free.